BYE

as it stated, I'm saying goodbye.

to who ?

this blog lah ! ;P

oh and I'm sorry for every mistakes I've done and I won't blame you if you don't want me. just tell me goodbye, I'll try to understand even though it will make a big hole in heart. I'll be bella, a good one I promise :)

study study study !

GO !

hellO

yes hello to you and salam to you. to whom ever really did read this poor lacking of everything blog ;P I just want to stated few things about me. random yet useful if you want to use it against me *xtau la mana tau ada orang nak berperang dgn saya ;P*

1- I have a low confidence level which I know for long time ago. I did want to change this attitude but no thanks, I'm happy with the way I am. I know I always 'look' confidence if I gave a presentation or something because I was bajet to look cool. it's all in the face and you can tell that I am not confidence at all. and even if I speak to anybody, it's just hard to see then in the eyes and just talk. I prefer looking at my feet than their face. it sort of scared me ? and it is really truly hard to talk to male except for my father. plus the fact that I hate 'em. okay enough.

2- I know many people said that 'you are the greatest friend I ever had' to their friends. I've got couple of that and that word made me think and the conclusion I've made, no I am not. it's just when I am down, my friend support me and sooth me in a very comfortable way. but when the other way around, I just don't know what to do and say. I could only just hug them and let go. I'm not a adviser person and that fact made me feel sick. huh

3- OKAY now we go to the bright side i guess ;P I LOVE DEBUSSY ! I know classic right ? HAHA. not only debussy, but the sound of piano (?) instrumental kot dorang panggil. entah. I also adore carter burwell. genius with the piano ;) terasa sebak je dengar bunyi ting ting ting tu berlagu. awwww ;) and tanam semangat baru nak ada keyboard bila ada rumah nanti. maybe I'm not playing it. HE HE HE ;P really love my new interest ! I call it piano listening. biar salah ;P

hah felt nice just to let it go for a while don't you think ?
I don't even know why you're reading my blog, anybody. macam lah ada apa dalam ni? puff~ okay perasan ada orang baca belah lah.
buhbye

and so ?

I have to repeat to myself so many time....

I DON'T CARE

I DON'T CARE

I DON'T CARE

some how, it release my tension ;)

salam ;)

okay today's post gonna sound like I'm a bad girl or something. HAHA putus fius gila minah ni ;P
*n my bahasa today gonna be like tak berapa betul sebab baru habis baca novel hlovate ;)*

malam semalam pergi rumah dinner kat rumah wak yah. sajasaja sebab nenek pun ada kat situ. then family uncle atan pun ada juga. and so does his son fazlan shah or simply alan ;)

Dalam family, belah mak la, orang boleh dikatakan memang lepak dengan budak laki. faham tak? HAHA biaaarrr. entah since kecik pun, kalau nak main-main lepas kutip duit raya pun, antara boys and girls mesti la buat aktiviti lain kan? so saya lebih tergerak mengikut aktiviti lelaki ;P and yg kurang dua tiga tahun dengan saya pun lelaki. takkan la nak main barbie doll dengan girls yg bawah umur tu? alamat menempah maut tak tidur malam ;P so saudara yg saya kamceng n satu kepala otak tak berapa nak betul is farid and alan. ingat lagi dulu waktu saya darjah 6 kot. parents farid which is my uncle and auntie ajak me and alan with farid ofcourse to awana genting. ya Allah memang biol kitorang waktu tu. habis semua lawak antara tanah tinggi keluar ! HAHAA ;) rinduuu. walaupun sekarang dah tak boleh nak ikut beronggeng sesuka hati w/o parents saya, kami still 3 kepala yg memang sewel tahap tak boleh belah ;P and when kitorang bergabung tenaga, memang riuh satu kampung. and n benda yg paling best be friend dengan dorg kan, boleh BELASAH dorg puas2 ! HAHA ye la mana boleh tetiba pukul laki stranger kan. kang tak pasal dia bawak geng dia mau tak hidup lagi insan bernama zulaikha ni ;P so kalau geram tahap giga pun, laki dua orang tu jadi magsa dera~ HAHA kesian tapi lantak. saudara ;P

the one with specs, is alan. and he is so much skinner than this ;) good job lah! the simply botak tu farid. paling best cubit dia sampai lebam ;P yg pegang tangan jebat tu azib. takdekena mengena dengan entry ni sorry ;P

okay benda kat atas ni saja tulis sebab lama tak bergelak sakan ngan dorg ;P rinduuu konon. HAHA nak muntah aku~

kembali ke alam yg betul sikit.

a slogan on a T-shirt by florida clothing company David and Goliath.

HAHA saya tahu gambar ni tak sama dengan post saya kat atas tu. tapi gambar ni macam membahagiakan saya. well atleast not all, I repeat, NOT ALL boys are stupid. only the one that melepak takde kerja lain nak melainkan dok phewit2 anak dara orang. n boys yg player tahap tak ingat dunia. n boys yg smoking. OMG I HATE YOU WITH ALL MY INTERNAL ORGAN ! wahai lelaki, tolong lah berubah mencontohi Rasulullah dan para sahabat. tak rugi. lagi perempuan suka *-_-* tinggalkan rempit lumba motor walaupun tak de niat. teruskan usaha mengenal Allah. n jangan buat orang baling batu kat diri tu. tolong lah jaga diri oi.

dah penat mengarut. sambung baca buku ;P

p/s : JANGAN LUPA TERUS BERDOA UNTUK SAUDARA SEISLAM KITA DI PALESTIN. WAJIB KITA MENDOA KAN MEREKA. SEMOGA ALLAH PERMUDAHKAN URUSAN MEREKA. AMIN.

salam !

some people say

salam.

we're going to play a game today. a game that start with: some people say...

some people say I am not like how I used to be
some people say I have change to more girlish me
some people say I abandon them to be with others
some people say I am smart and I can get high score
some people say I studied the most
some people say I am the most happy person they met
some people say nothing

well

I say I am changing and it is never your problem
I say will you hate me just because I am more girlish
I say I never going to abandon those who doesn't abandon me
I say everybody are equal in their mental state
I say simply no
I say never judge the book by it's cover
I say just get lost

lastly, I DON'T CARE .

mood swing~

salam !

sorry for my mood swing. I know I shouldn't have effect others around me with my emotion. I've been training them. yes, I've been training my emotion. even when I'm crying, at a split second I can laugh for those who made me cry. HEBAT tak hebat anak mak dah pandai berlakon ! HAHAHA ;P but sometimes, rasa penat dan tak larat. so ter-effect orang tu. I am mad at you but usually I padam all those feeling away. but entah la, terasa penat dan tak larat. so saya berdiam diri dan shut my mouth up so I won't shout at you. so now, I am very and trully sorry for the way I behave. may Allah pelihara me from any baaaaad emotion and feeeeeling :)

okay ayat x betul sebab english and bm sudah habis ! ;P padahal spm belum kot !

good luck fellows for the remaining papers. konvoi ramai2 pergi kino hari jumaat before cuti okay !

toodles !
*yup, emosi still tak setabil. kejap biol kejap sengal. biasalah anak gadis -___-

something we can't force? or can we?

salam.
there's nothing much.but yup, I do staring out the windows for couple of minutes and my friend would say, "oi berangan !" and I will be back to normal. the thing is, it, snot me that I'm berangan about. it's me and my surrounding. tak paham abaikan. look, people share things right? and of course they share it with someone they trust. I also did that BUT when I share my thing with the people I trust, I don't tell any body else especially my good friends. why in the world did I do that? what do you think when your good friend share their problem with some other good friend, but you know she has a problem and you also know she tell the others but not you. she never going to tell you what she tell to the other. do you know what this person feel?

stupidly helpless .

okay fine if you don't want me to know your problem, but please, just please don't talk about your prob with the other IN FRONT of me. seriously I'm tired of all this. I know I should stand beside you and help you help you, but what could I do if you don't want this person to be beside you? it is your choice, not mine. and if really are getting tired of me, let me know. I can be away, I promise.

ya Allah, bless us with your nur and sakinah. make the bond between us the strongest of them all, so that we can find Your path, together. Amin